Updated: Jul 27, 2018
Recently I had a meal out with my parents and a family friend and we got into a very heated discussion about the sexual allegation stories that have been coming out recently. I don’t think I have ever felt this angry in my life, I was actually shaking as this is something that I feel very passionately about and I’m sure many others do too.
There have been so many accusation being made at the moment, but the story that started/caused the heated debate was the one regarding Michael Fallon lunging at a young reporter. As a young woman in the working world, not only do I find this very degrading and discussing behavior, I also think that taking advantage of anyone, man or woman, is not acceptable under any circumstance.
In response to this story our family friend said “women nowadays need to get a sense of humour and learn what banta is”. I do not under any circumstance think that this behavior is funny or could merely be classed as banta. I understand that we all have our opinions and I respect that, but when someone is making light of these allegations I have no tolerance and feel like I have to retaliate.
I was making the point that if someone is put in the position where they feel uncomfortable and threatened they should speak out and tell someone, whether it’s a family member, a friend, a therapist or tabloids, where as our friend was saying that “it happened 14 years ago, the woman should get over it” or that if she was in that position she would just tell him to leave her alone. I believe she meant well, but when put in that situation most people would freeze and not know what to do and as soon as they have thought of a way to get out of it, the damage has already been done.
Also by saying “it happened 14 years ago, the woman should get over it” sounds like she thinks victims should stay silent. Because of views like these, victims have been brushing aside these traumas while watching their abusers continue as if nothing had happened and only now, they feel comfortable and supported enough to be able to speak out.
She also made the point that “are these allegations worth risking someone’s job”… are you serious! Is hiding these facts worth putting multiple other victims at risk as well as potentially affecting your own mental state?
As children, one of the first things you are taught is that actions have consequences! This applies to everyone not just kids, why should anyone get away with it!